There are Angels Among Us

A few months ago, I noticed my neighbors across the street getting ready for a party. I watched the moon bounce go up and countless preparations busily being made.  The next day, Sarah and I returned home and the party was in full swing. Sarah took a few long looks at the moon bounce and all the festivities, while I held her hand tight and brought her and my groceries inside. As I put groceries away and cleaned the kitchen, I glanced out of the window every few minutes. I saw kids running all over the place and I noticed that the family giving the party had invited their neighbors - a new family with 5 kids. Everyone looked like they we're having such a great time.

I felt the tears springing to my eyes before I could even think about it. I wished Sarah had been invited. As I sat there fighting the tears, I gave myself a good fussing. I and myself actually had a serious chat. "They don't know us like that, why would they invite us?" "Well they know us enough to let my husband help them shovel snow." "They can clearly see that Sarah is older, why would they invite her." "They don't know she has autism and that she's probably developmentally closer to the age of their kids".  On and on I went until I'd had enough of my own carrying on. All the frustrations and fears and yes - even a little anger boiled to the surface as I closed my kitchen blinds and kept on cleaning. I tried to get to the bottom of my feelings and calm myself down. But a mother...well a mother is a mother and sometimes there is just no rationality when it comes to a mother and her child. So, I figured the best thing to do was to ride the feelings out, and eventually I sat down to do what I usually do when I get all worked up. No I didn't have a glass of wine or cry on my husband's shoulder for hours complaining about the unfairness of life. I wrote.

I wrote a long post on Facebook about autism acceptance and how much my life had changed - how much my social life had changed. I felt better after getting it off my chest. Tons of people responded, but I think only a few really GOT it. Two of those people were my friends Mary and Bridget. They both asked what I was waiting for, when was I coming to visit. They both said Sarah was welcome in their homes and their families. They both meant it.

That day I started making plans to take Sarah on a road trip to New England to see a friend I hadn't seen in 14 years and a friend I had never laid eyes on (more on that another time). Within a day or so, we had the plans worked out. We would go in August. I would drive with Sarah. They both said they were thrilled that I was coming. I was excited. I was elated. I was scared.

The trip would be Sarah's longest car ride. I would be by myself. She's getting bigger - how would we manage the restrooms? When we went in together, would she try to run out? Would she cry? And what about staying in two different homes with people she had never seen? How would she manage? How would I manage? How would they manage? All these thoughts ran through the back of my mind, but I pushed them aside and started counting the days.

As the trip drew near, I really started to panic. I asked my hubby if he could manage to join us
halfway through the trip. Forget the fact that he was traveling heavily. I thought I might be physically
and mentally worn thin doing it on my own.

Finally, early on a Thursday morning in August, Sarah and I started our big adventure. What happened over the next few days was nothing short of wonderful (I'll get to the details of the trip in another post). My friends are angels. I'm convinced. No, not perfect beings who do no wrong and sing praises to God all day. My friends are arms wide open, homes wide open, roll with the punches, accept you as you are, love you as you are, no big deal, my home is your home type of gals. Being with them was one of those rare blessings that God gives you - those rare moments when you know that He is giving you peek into heaven through the kindness, generosity and love of others. We didn't do anything extra special during the days of my trip, but they will forever be ingrained in my memory as some of the most special days of my life. I don't know if I will ever find the words to tell those two angels how much that trip meant to me. I still get teary-eyed thinking about it. So, you'll have to wait a little longer to read about the details of our trip.